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Media
November 14, 2008
Martin Eisenstadt Is Not Deep Throat
You may want to take a seat for this one. As you've surely heard by now, until she was nominated for vice president, Sarah Palin though Africa was a country and not a continent, according to Fox News. But if that sounded fishy to you—in spite of Palin's rather obvious lack of intelligence, it sounded fishy to us—you may have been unsurprised to learn that the source of the rumor was fake pundit Martin Eisenstadt. Or was it? Nobody quite knows.
World
November 14, 2008
Extremism in Defense of Extremism
Announcing that Iran had just successfully tested a missile able to reach Europe, President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad informed the world that "the Iranian nation defends its dignity. Should any power stand against the Iranian nation, the Iranian people will crush it under its foot and will strike it on the mouth." While the notion itself is somewhat unsettling, we can take comic relief in his choice of words—how exactly will the Iranian people crush a power under their feet while striking it in the mouth? We're not sure, but it reminds of some of the words used by fringe types of yesterday and today.
Media
November 13, 2008
Flat Tommy
New York Times foreign affairs columnist Tom Friedman sees things in 2-D. Based on the titles of his recent books, not only is the world flat, but it is also hot, and crowded. Al Qaeda's flat, too, and something called "Globalization 3.0" (apparently the web has yet to catch up with globalization) is "shrinking the world from size small to size tiny, and flattening the global economic playing field at the same time." Fuck you, Galileo!
Politics
November 12, 2008
Smoking Bloggers Out of Their Caves
If it weren't for those meddlesome bloggers, Sarah Palin might have become the vice president of these United States. Instead, though, she was run back to Wasilla on a rail of unfounded speculation created by the laptoparazzi in their dank, underground abodes. Palin joined the ranks of her fellow sports reporters Rick Reilly, Bob Costas, and Dan Shaughnessy when she told FOX's Greta Van Susteren, "I'm going to characterize them as those bloggers in their parents' basement just talking garbage." Well put. But how could Palin know the exact location of these evildoers' hideouts? Perhaps she's been collecting intelligence from two particular conservative cognoscenti.
Politics
November 11, 2008
Election? What Election?
It's always fun when a headline from the Onion comes true after the fact—but when your publication runs a story right out of the satirical paper on the same day—and the biggest news day of the year, at that—maybe its time to reconsider your news judgment. And so while the Onion might be justified in placing the election of a local politician on its front page instead of the election of the nation's first black president, real papers who did the same can't claim to be satire.
Media
November 11, 2008
The Biggest Glossies Pick The Best Cities
American magazines—Forbes in particular—have made something of a cottage industry out of serving up linkbait in the form of lists telling you where to live. Want to be surrounded by intellectuals? The physically fit? Want to live a stress-free life, or raise a family? Forbes—with some help from Business Week and Men's Fitness—has the answers for you, based on some poorly picked stats thrown haphazardly together!
Politics
November 7, 2008
Obama Loses! (to Kerry among Whites in the South)
Though liberals had a lot to celebrate on Tuesday, not all is suddenly right (or wrong, depending on how you look at it) with America. (Nor will it be once Obama takes office, but that's another matter entirely.) Aside from gay-marriage bans passing in three states—including, surprisingly, California—and a gay-adoption ban passing in Arkansas, the most dispiriting aspect of the rather spiriting 2008 election comes from exit polls from the Deep South.
Media
November 6, 2008
Screwing the Gay Side in California
While many in the presumably fake America celebrated the election of card-carrying fake American Barack Obama this week, it was a bittersweet victory for supporters of California's gay community. That blue state, which went for Obama by a huge margin, also passed Proposition 8, which added to the state constitution the line, "Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid and recognized in California." California's somewhat schizophrenic electorate led to some rather amusing turns of phrase by reporters and headline writers.
Politics
November 3, 2008
Bob the Plumber on Joe the Plumber
In case you were wondering—and we know you were—Joe "the Plumber" Wurzelbacher is not the only plumber with an opinion on politics. When Gelf set out last week to find other ordinary American plumbers, we encountered the website of Bob the Plumber, who, while now retired, is actually a licensed plumber, unlike the more-famous McCain-supporter-cum-possible-country-star.
Politics
October 31, 2008
How American is Your Hometown?
Sarah Palin, John McCain, and even Barack Obama, have all told us about the "real" America. In this mythical place, people work hard (though they may or may not pay their taxes), have "family values" and are "pro-America." But not all of America is the real America—some parts of this great land are, indeed, fake American, or even Un-American.
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