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September 8, 2006

Bert Fucks Up

Continuing Gelf's ongoing coverage of how the press reports on profanity without using profanity, we've examined how the press handled former pitcher Bert Blyleven's fuck-up, when previewing a Yankees-twins game. After stumbling through some tidbits about A-Rod, Derek Jeter, and Joe Mauer, Blyleven said, "We're going to do this fucking thing over again, because I just fucked it up." Oops, he was live, as his broadcast partner, Anthony LaPanta, informed him. The former 287-game winner was suspended for five games.

The Pittsbrugh Post-Gazette, in its coverage of the extended suspension today, fucked up by reporting that Blyleven "uttered the same profanity twice." Clearly "fucking" and "fucked" are different words. The Associated Press, in its initial report, did better, referring to "two profanities" and adding that "the words are on the Federal Communications Commission's list of words that can't be broadcast between 6 a.m. and 10 p.m." Bert's "fucked" and "fucking" came at around noon. (Disappointingly, the FCC doesn't spell out its banned words in this factsheet about obscenity, saying only that "language so grossly offensive to members of the public who actually hear it as to amount to a nuisance." Fuck that.)

Kansas City Star columnist Jeffrey Flanagan wrote, rather preciously, "Blyleven dropped some profanity—yes, the naughty ones." Later, Flanagan quoted Royals broadcaster Ryan Lefebvre saying, "I had no idea you could let 'er rip after 10 p.m. I guess at 10:01 p.m. it's OK to drop a few bombs. You might want to cover your ears next Royals game at 10:01." The St. Paul Pioneer Press was a bit more explicit, referring to "two crystal-clear 'f-bombs,' " and even telling readers they could "see Bert's antics on www.youtube.com." The Minneapolis Star Tribune referred to "f-words." But the Arizona Republic's Bob Young, in a column today, wins for most creative way to tell readers exactly what went down:

He was scheduled to return to the booth Thursday after serving a two-game suspension for dropping a couple on-air F-bombs.


Blyleven stumbled through a breakdown of the Yankees' Alex Rodriguez, then got a little tongue-tied while commenting on Twins catcher Joe Mauer when he got frustrated:

"We're going to do this (expletive) thing over again because I just (expletive) it up," Blyleven grumbled.

LaPanta, not the first to be tied up by a Blyleven curveball, paused for a second then said, "Well . . . we're live."

"I didn't know that," Blyleven said matter-of-factly.







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